‘Straya, Down Under, The Wide Brown Land.
‘Straya is a large far away place full of not many people. ‘Straya’s roots were sewn in 1788, when a bunch of Poms came over with 11 boat loads of convicts; the first Reffo’s. Prior to this the land which is now ‘Straya was home to various unique wild animals including the many tribes of Abo, who spent all day painting graffiti in their home caves and chucking bent sticks at furry animals. The land was then divided into six individual Pommy colonies, five of which were penal colonies. Thus the first ‘Strayan’s were yobbos and that goes some way to explaining why ‘Strayan’s to this day posses the irreverent, larrikin attitude they are known for.
In 1901, the colonies and territories were, after much blueing and barneying, federated into one country and ‘Straya came into being.
Subsequent waves of Reffo’s have resulted in a mixed bag of customs, cultures and bloodlines, making for a diverse and interesting place to live. The separate origins and identities of each state, not to mention the influences of a multi-cultural population has meant that the way that ‘Strayan’s yarn is not only different to other people, but is nuanced throughout the country and yarning with one group of ‘Strayans is not always the same as yarning with another bunch of ‘Strayans.
With the mixed population, there is the added bonus that when the most rootable examples of each group throw a leg over, the sprogs so produced of these unions are very rootable indeed.
All of this is without considering Un Zid, which is dilt wuth subsequently.
‘Strayans, at least in theory, speak English; so getting the gist of any conversation will be straightforward for anyone who speaks English. In addition, with so many Wogs, Frogs, Nig Nogs, Slopes, Diego’s, and Reffos living in ‘Straya, most ‘Strayans will be able to deal with strong accents and be willing to make the effort to slow down and be understood. Even though ’Strayans who live in the bush already speak agonisingly slowly as it is. In addition many of the colloquial terms are hang-overs from ‘Straya’s Pommy origins, while much of the more contemporary slang is borrowed from the Seppos, who we watch prodigiously on the gobbly box or at the flicks.
What follows is as far as possible restricted to uniquely ‘Strayan words and phrases, with some of the more frequently heard foreign examples being noted as synonyms of ‘Strayan equivalents; thus the Pommy ‘shag’ and Seppo ‘pork’, are not listed individually despite being frequently used in ‘Straya, but are included as synonyms of root.
As a consequence of a small population, many ‘Strayans are well aware of the existence of the world beyond their borders, unlike many Seppos, and in some cases will be keen to find out more about you and your home. This small population and increasingly wide interest from abroad, makes some ‘Strayans self-conscious of themselves and their country; so hanging shit on them can have your hosts turning narky in no time.
In recent years, ‘Strayans have found themselves increasingly under the yoke of political correctness, as imposed by increasingly anti-democratic gumment, a growing number of habitually indignant and various other wankers. This discourages and even outlaws many of the things ‘Strayans think and should say, and it is not uncommon for older ‘Strayans to frequently tread on their dicks as a result. Indeed, the whole section; WHERE’RE YA FROM?, most likely contravenes a raft of racial hatred laws; my heart bleeds.
Learning to chew the fat in ‘Straya is not too difficult and with many ‘Strayans popping up around the world (usually wherever there is cricket, footy or piss), you may already have heard some of what follows.
